In the last week or so I’ve found out that as an atheist and an American I’m supposed to be mad at Glenn Beck for not inviting me to watch his show this Friday.
Why did Glenn Beck not invite little ole me to tune in? Because I do not believe in the existence of his invisible friend in the sky which makes it a bit hard to have “It” at the centre of my life, a principle Beck has made a condition of being invited to watch his show.
I’m supposed to be mad about this.
That sound you just heard? That was me laughing. I tried to be mad. I swear I did. It’s just that… How do I say this?
It’s like someone walking up to you & saying “I was going to offer you a bottle of piss to drink, but I don’t like your shoes, so no bottle of piss for you”.
Would you really get mad about not getting that bottle of piss? Would you feel compelled to protest not being offered a bottle of piss because of your shoes and demand the person apologize?
So what’s with being pissed off about Glenn Beck not inviting atheists? He’s a jackass and all you need to do in order to realize this is sit down and consider the those principles:
- America is good.
- This is what white Republican men say when the America that’s being criticized is being ran by white Republican men.
- I believe in God and He is the Center of my Life.
- This is what white Republican men say in order to justify policies that contribute to the discrimination, oppression and/or poverty of people who are not white Republican men.
- I must always try to be a more honest person than I was yesterday.
- This is what white Republican men say they’re going to do when they’re caught acting like white Republican men in public.
- The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority, not the government.
- This is what white Republican men say when the government is used to stop them from usurping the sacred authority of parents who are not white Republican men.
- If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.
- This is what white Republican men say about anyone who isn’t a white Republican man.
- I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results.
- This is what white Republican men say when things come into being that put the rest of us on the same footing as white Republican men.
- I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable.
- This is what white Republican men say when public funding goes to things that do not directly benefit white Republican men.
- It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.
- This is what white Republican men say when the authority they’re criticizing is not another white Republican man.
- The government works for me. I do not answer to them, they answer to me.
- This is what white Republican men say when the president is not a white Republican man.
Still convinced atheists, especially those of us who are not white Republican men, should be upset for not being invited to watch the little jackass?